A customer just came in and asked Charlie, "Do you have mask-making materials?"

"Yes." Charlie chirped. She's always glad when someone asks for something I actually contain. She jumped up and showed the man and his wife the plastic mask forms and rigid wrap plaster bandages.

"Fine." The man said. "And where around here would we be able to buy lava?"

Charlie was really quiet for a minute. Then she replied, "Well, anywhere on the ground around here, I suppose."

"Are there any guidelines for using it?" His wife inquired.

"Well, there is a tradition of people saying that Pele doesn't want to leave the island. So if you're planning to take any of the rock to the mainland, you might reconsider."

"Oh yes," the wife said, looking at her husband as if to say I told you so, "I've heard of people's houses burning down..."

"And just having bad luck and mailing the lava back." Charlie added.

"So are there guidelines for handling the lava?" The man persisted.

Charlie got really quiet for about two minutes. Then she asked for clarification, looking at the man's eyes for the joke, "Are you wanting to make a mask out of the molten lava?"

"Yes!" He exclaimed, "I just think it would be so incredible with the stuff pouring out right here, you know?"

"Problem is," Charlie almost stuttered, "anything you might use to form the lava would get vaporized."

"Oh really?" The man looked skeptical.

"It would burst into flames, whether it contained moisture or not." I could see that Charlie was picturing a small explosion.

"Poof!" The wife said.